Sunday, February 12, 2012

Feelings...

My heart is pounding up and down and I really can't concentrate for this past 24 hours. We have made a really dramatic decision that will affect the rest of my life. I need to make sure that there are no regrets. This will be the turning point for my life and there shouldn't be any mistakes because of irrationality. I can't think for a moment or two. The fact that my boyfriend and I had suddenly change our plan make me a little nervous. For one thing, this was not under my plan and I need some time to accept the change. My heart had can't stop beating. It is going up to 100 beats per minute at rest.

If I were really accepted to UK this coming September, this would be the time which I would be leaving Singapore and going for another place for good. There would be no turning and I realised that I am so not prepared for it. To stay here 3 months lesser does not seem to make any significant different but I assume I am just not prepared. Even my Daddy is for my decision, there shouldn't be anything I should worry except for whether the university would accept me or not.

Being afraid that the university wouldn't accept me should not happen. I have a little more confident on that because it is still under my control. I just need to find a way to sell myself. It's just that I realise I have spent my last year with my work and there is no particular significant events that I had attend. I know that my boyfriend had kept on repeating that fact to me but I just thought it was not that important than staying at home with my mother. However, looking at him, I have no worries and regrets passing my life and relying on him for the rest of my life. He has made me felt safe, happy and loved. It doesn't matter what I do, the fact that he will be with me makes me happy. That makes me worried because we have had to get into the same university this year, if not , our plans will all be ruined again and he will not be happy. It goes the same for me too.

May God bless us and our decision.

Thursday, January 12, 2012